Shadow (dariaphoebe) wrote,

I was puffing quite hard. Only about halfway up the hill, and I was feeling it. 36 hours before, on the same ride, my lungs atypically burned at the end. The smoke from everyone's fire pits on that lovely evening were a bit much when I was already breathing heavily. Still, I was determined that today, as the morning before, that I was ascending this hill. It was all or nothing. After all, pulling up short would be backsliding, relinquishing ground on a conquest I'd already made.

An hour later, it was time for therapy again. I granted that I could not dispute what others had told me, that I was a strong person. Why didn't it come from me, why did it have to be what I was told, she posed. I thought about it. "Nothing's really different today than it was yesterday. It makes sense when you look back at it but there was no point where I got strong. It just happened." Like the hill I'd climbed that morning. With a little weaving and dodging I climb it in chunks, but when you look back down from the top, knowing you just did it doesn't make it more seem any more likely that it's doable.

After finishing the hill that morning, I had biked past the lady who asked me a week or so ago if I was training. Her back was to me as she was locked her house. I realized today I had a better answer: Yes, I am training. I'm not sure exactly what I am training for, and I won't necessarily know even when that training pays off, but I am definitely training for something.

Step 34: keep at it, even if you don't always recognize the progress you are making while you're making it.
Tags: progress, transition

  • (no subject)

    For just a moment, as I continued along my riverside path, I let my eyes turn inland. There wasn't much reason to: ahead of me lie the trail I…

  • (no subject)

    As we stood at the curb, we talked about the city, the place I now called home. Until moments before, it had been business as we walked around an…

  • (no subject)

    As the rest of the band stepped away, just one remained. He delivered just a single verse, acoustic, before the others returned for the final song of…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.